09-05-2026, 08:09 AM
Lol I did see you online last night at like 4am UK time. I just thought you had a very early start for some reason or another. Weirdly also coincided with a night where I struggled to sleep (but I think that was 10% random thoughts, 90% jet lag!)
It's hard to know what is really happening with anyone's personal relationships or ability to come out of their shell or connect with people now, but one thing I actually discussed with a friend of mine who I met up with in Shanghai the other night was that; my limited ability as an adolescent to speak to my friends online really felt beneficial and healthy to my friendships and relationships. If, between the ages of about 10 - 14/15, I wanted to speak to friends online, I'd have a limited window to do it, in a separate dedicated space (my PC desk) which was also a shared space and screen with my other hobbies, so I had to make a clear choice; do I engage in this hobby (PC gaming, PS2/3, etc.) Whilst at this desk, in this space, or do I socialise online in a limited capacity with people, or do I actually leave this space and watch TV downstairs with my family on the MASSIVE (32/36 inch) flat screen?!
Weirdly, I think it helped me build genuine friendships and relationships, by having forced distance - I wasn't always accessible on my phone, WhatsApp was years off for me and Facebook Messenger had no app - my phone was pretty archaic, so texting was really just for essential use, and I would have much more excitement and curiosity in seeing and meeting people, and honestly I want to sort of manufacture that kind of distance in the future to build more exciting times in friendships.
Despite all that I've said above, the methodical and slower nature of a forum retains that kind of distance I crave I think. It's a bit of a treat being able to sit on the train, see people's posts when I have a spare hour after reading and responding individually.
It's hard to know what is really happening with anyone's personal relationships or ability to come out of their shell or connect with people now, but one thing I actually discussed with a friend of mine who I met up with in Shanghai the other night was that; my limited ability as an adolescent to speak to my friends online really felt beneficial and healthy to my friendships and relationships. If, between the ages of about 10 - 14/15, I wanted to speak to friends online, I'd have a limited window to do it, in a separate dedicated space (my PC desk) which was also a shared space and screen with my other hobbies, so I had to make a clear choice; do I engage in this hobby (PC gaming, PS2/3, etc.) Whilst at this desk, in this space, or do I socialise online in a limited capacity with people, or do I actually leave this space and watch TV downstairs with my family on the MASSIVE (32/36 inch) flat screen?!
Weirdly, I think it helped me build genuine friendships and relationships, by having forced distance - I wasn't always accessible on my phone, WhatsApp was years off for me and Facebook Messenger had no app - my phone was pretty archaic, so texting was really just for essential use, and I would have much more excitement and curiosity in seeing and meeting people, and honestly I want to sort of manufacture that kind of distance in the future to build more exciting times in friendships.
Despite all that I've said above, the methodical and slower nature of a forum retains that kind of distance I crave I think. It's a bit of a treat being able to sit on the train, see people's posts when I have a spare hour after reading and responding individually.
TomRL101 Wrote:You're not S̵̢̨̻̜̣̥͔͇̻̥̩̖̫̟̞̤̻̏̊ͅC̵̡̧̢̼̩̬͇̫̱̮̹̭͔͍̰̼̱͆̀̓́͜͜͜͜ͅͅǍ̸̢̧̝̞̞̱͔̠̯͈̯̅̒͗̉̓̔̋̏̂̓̒̄̊͐̎͘͘͠R̶̨͖̹͓̠̦̖͎͖̙̗̰̣͕̠̺̗̥̗͋͜Y̵̨̧̧̩͉̣̦̮̰̭̰͔̥͓͕̩̞̘̯͚̪̲͆̅̓̿̾̆̀͑̏̓̃̂̎̓̃̽̈͒́͋̈̀̋̓͆͑̕̚̚͜͝͝ enough to talk to me. Please stop.
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